How Debt Collectors Trigger Old Wounds (and How to Reclaim Your Power)

Let’s be real: debt collectors have a way of making you feel small.

That voicemail. That letter in the mail with the bold red letters. That unknown number calling again and again.

It can send you spiraling straight back to being a kid overhearing grown folks whisper about “bills we can’t pay.”

Debt isn’t just numbers.

It’s shame.

It’s fear.

It’s old wounds ripped open every time the phone rings.

I’ll never forget the first time a debt collector called me at work. My hands started shaking so badly I could barely hold the phone. My throat tightened. I wasn’t just embarrassed. I was triggered. It felt like proof that I was failing, that no matter how hard I worked, I’d never catch up.

But here’s what I eventually learned: their job is intimidation. Your job is protection.

You don’t have to let their tactics decide your worth. You get to reclaim your power.

Here’s how:

✨ Know your rights. 

In the U.S., debt collectors cannot harass you, call at all hours, or threaten things they legally can’t do. Look up the Fair Debt Collection Practices Act. Knowledge is armor.

✨ Don’t engage emotionally. 

They want you rattled. They want the panic. Breathe. Slow down. Remember: you don’t owe them access to your fear.

✨ Communicate on your terms. 

If phone calls trigger you, you can legally request that they only contact you by mail. Boundaries aren’t just for people. They’re for institutions too.

✨ Seek support. 

You don’t have to carry this alone. A financial therapist, credit counselor, or even a trusted friend can help you navigate the stress.

Here’s the truth: debt does not define your worth

It does not mean you are irresponsible.

It does not erase the progress you’ve made.

You are not powerless.

You are learning.

You are growing.

You are reclaiming.

You are healing. And no collection call can take that away.

☕️ Let’s sit with this over a cup of coffee.

If debt collectors have ever left you shaky, ashamed, or right back in “little kid survival mode,” I want you to know that are not alone, and you don’t have to keep fighting this battle by yourself.

This is why I do the work I do. To help people like us untangle the fear from the finances. To remind you that boundaries are holy, that your worth isn’t up for negotiation, and that healing is possible, even with debt in the picture.

If this blog stirred something in you, let’s keep the conversation going. Send me a DM, share your story in the comments, or grab a virtual coffee chat with me. Because freedom doesn’t start with the numbers. It starts with reclaiming your peace.

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